Dream Killers

If you went for a medical checkup and the doctor told you you were going to die, what would you do? For most of us it would be a no-brainer. Get a second opinion.

So why do so many young people in this business listen to one opinion and take it as gospel?

I do quite a few tape critiques of young people in my mentoring business. On many occasions I get a tape that I really like, and write a glowing critique. And about half the time I get this reaction:

"Really?"

So many of you remind me of Sally Field when she won the Academy Award and said, "You like me, you really like me!"

And that brings us to today's topic, people I call "Dream Killers."

Dream Killers are everywhere. Most are found in newsrooms, but you'll run into them on college campuses and at conventions. The scenario is the same: you ask someone to look at your goodie reel and are told that you're hopeless, that you need to find another line of work, that you are wasting your time in this business. Or someone (usually a News Director) just offers that opinion without being asked. You slink away embarrassed that you even thought you could make it in television news, that you spent four years in college studying something that you won't be able to do. That a dream to spend your life doing something you love has been hopelessly shattered.

All because one person offered an opinion.

As reporters you are trained to get two sides of every story... so why do you accept just one when it comes to your career?

So let's look at the psychology of the Dream Killer. Many of these people actually get their natural highs from taking people down. Maybe they never made it as a reporter and can't stand to see someone else succeed. Maybe they have lousy home lives and take those feelings to work. Maybe they're just plain mean. Some can't stomach people who are smarter and more talented.

Doesn't matter.

Only you can take away your own dream. To listen to one person's opinion, especially when that opinion is purely negative, just doesn't make sense.

There's a difference between constructive criticism and a negative opinion. There's a difference between saying, "Your standups are awful" and, "You need a little more energy in your standups... walk a little faster." The former teaches you nothing, the latter helps you build a skill.

I've had to critique some tapes that were truly awful. I remember one in particular that belonged to a recent graduate. The tape was a mess; bad packages, horrible editing, standups that could have been done by a mannequin. The young lady's hair and clothes were a disaster. But under all that was some solid writing. And peering out of the mannequin was a pair of eyes that had some definite spark. And I could hear something intangible over the phone: passion.

In that case, I had to take her back to Broadcast Journalism 101 and teach package construction. One trip to the salon fixed the bad hair. One shopping trip took care of the wardrobe. The client worked hard, following the dream, eventually coming up with a tape good enough to get her foot in the door of a small market. Three years later this reporter is working in a good market. You wouldn't even recognize her from her original tape.

On the other side of the coin are the tapes that just blow me away. Tapes that show pure talent and potential. And very often they belong to people who have been beaten down by News Directors or opinions of "experts" who have given out free advice. Their dreams have been chipped and battered. They have lost confidence in their ability, all because of a comment from a Dream Killer.

Over the years I've seen hundreds of interns wander through stations. I am often surprised at the people who seemed clueless at the time, then eventually carved out great careers. People change a lot in their 20's... give yourself time to grow and learn. But learn from the constructive comments; throw the mean ones away. Hard to do, I know, as a cruel comment can cut right to the bone. But you guys are news people, you're tough.

Look, some of you reading this may never catch the brass ring. Some of you may reach your ultimate goal. The point is that we all enter this business with passion and a dream. No one, regardless of experience or standing, can take those away from you.

I once got a fortune cookie that read, "Without dreams you have no future." Think of that the next time someone tells you to give up.

Then don't.